Hollywood tends to glamorize criminals by making them look like masterminds who are always one step ahead of the law, but rarely is that the case in the real world. Just take a look at these two criminals who clearly weren’t thinking straight during their criminal activities.
Gun Beats Knife, Bat
They say you should never bring a knife to a gunfight, but that’s exactly what one would-be criminal did when he attempted to rob a gun store with a knife and a baseball bat late last month.
Derrick Mosley, 22, was in the market for a new handgun when he decided the easiest way to obtain one would be to steal one from a store. Armed with a 9-inch blade and a Louisville Slugger, Mosley walked into Discount Gun Sales in Beaverton, Oregon. Upon entering the establishment, Mosley smashed a display case and reached down to choose one of his liking.
Unfortunately for Mosley, he attempted the robbery in broad daylight, and in plain view of the store’s manager. The quick-thinking manager grabbed his personal sidearm, which unlike the firearms in the display case, was loaded with bullets.
The manager ordered Mosley to drop the unloaded gun, knife, and baseball bat, and he held him in his sights until the authorities arrived. The sheriff’s department arrived on scene a short while later, where they booked Mosley on charges of first-degree robbery, first-degree theft, unlawful possession of a firearm, and second-degree criminal mischief. A judge set his bail at $250,000
We imagine the scene unfolded something like this.
Not the Smartest “Cover Up” Attempt
A 19-year-old Knoxville man was charged with felony theft, public intoxication, underage consumption, misdemeanor vandalism and indecent exposure after he drunkenly attempted to steal a construction vehicle over the weekend.
It all began after Joseph Michael Hall, 19, realized he needed to get home after a night of drinking. Hall noticed a Bobcat front loader sitting in a nearby landscaping nursery, and he decided it would be the perfect vehicle to help him in his quest home. Not surprisingly, a neighbor was alerted to the disturbance after hearing the Bobcat plow through a chain link fence.
Acting on the tip from the neighbor, authorities attempted to track down the Bobcat thief. When authorities caught up to Hall a few blocks from his residence, they found the teenager was driving the Bobcat without any clothes on. When asked why he was driving the Bobcat in the nude, Hall said that he took the vehicle in order to hide his nudity.
Authorities weren’t initially sure where Hall’s clothes had gone in the first place, but they arrested him and booked him at the Knox County Detention Facility. If only he had walked by a pants store instead of a landscaping nursery.
Related sources: Huffington Post, Slate.com
